Less Stuff, More Love: The Case for Simplicity in Family Life
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Over the years, I've watched a lot of parents raise their children in the Greater San Francisco Bay Area, but one family has always stood out for me as remarkable in the simple yet wise choices they made.
I learned a lot from them, as you may too.
While most of our friends lived in gated communities sporting homes that now range well over a million, this particular family lived in the worst part of town.
Not only was it the worst part of town, but it was one of the worst parts of town, in one of the worst suburbs of the Greater San Francisco Bay Area.
The mother chose to stay home with her children and the father, who was an extremely talented man, devoted his time to working for a non-profit he believed in while earning extremely low wages.
They had nothing more than a dinky two-bedroom apartment, and they had one beat-up car. There were three children who all shared one bedroom for their entire childhood.
But these parents were more successful in raising their children than some of the well-paid executives the father worked for.
What was their secret?
They chose to raise their children with very little, so that their mother could stay home and educate with them. But the "very little" paid extremely high dividends.
These children were unspoiled, they espoused the mother's excellent values, and they were closely-knit due to their tight living quarters.
They had no extra-curricular activities, no fancy clothes, no 3-car driveways, just simple living. All three children grew up to be wise, kind, and extremely bright.
In a sense, the parents lived lives of service, which modern psychology tells us is the key to lasting happiness; the father’s in his work and the mother’s in her home.
I was reflecting on this particular family the other day after reading an article in the news about the increase in RV living because of the unaffordable cost of living in America.
There was one striking story of a single mother who lost her home and had to move her son and daughter into an RV.
What I found so promising was the change in the boy Dante, who could not longer play his video games and was forced to find his entertainment in the raw and wild outdoors.
Here's what Dante said about his new circumstances: “Before we moved, I hate to say it, but I was just a shut-in. I was inside all the time playing in my room, playing video games, doing whatever just inside,” he said. “But now I’m a lot healthier. I’ve been outside. I’ve been running around, getting some sun.”
Over the past few months, he said he’s learned how to fish and cook and gotten to spend more time with his mom and sister.
“I think it’s actually better than having a big house because I’ve learned a lot of stuff this summer,” he said. “I’ve learned more in three months than I have in my whole entire 11 years of being alive.”
The article goes on to say that "Dante, who celebrated his 12th birthday in the RV, is in no rush to leave."
His mother’s misfortune will probably result in Dante becoming more intelligent, more creative, and more successful in life just by virtue of having to use his mind more.
Sometimes good things come in unwanted packages.
I share these stories with you because Western society tends to forget the things that matter most, such as a mother in the home to instill wholesome values and educate her children, not to mention screen-free childhoods.
A mother's presence will always trump a bigger house, endless play outdoors will always trump a video game, and homeschooling "done right" will always trump a government education.
Get a copy of Liz’s “could not live without” book, Education’s Not the Point: How Schools Fail to Train Children’s Minds and Nurture Their Characters with groundbreaking Essays on educating your kids by John Taylor Gatto, Dorothy Sayers, and Liz herself.
About Elizabeth Y. Hanson
Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a “whole” child, based on tradition and modern research, Liz devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.
Liz is a homeschooling thought-leader, as well as the creator of three unique online courses, Raise Your Child Well: Preserving Your Child's Natural Genius by Laying a Solid Foundation During the First Seven Years; the Smart Homeschooler Academy, educating children who are brilliant, happy, and well-socialized; and How to Teach Your Child to Read and Raise a Child Who Loves to Read.
As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Liz has 23 years of experience guiding parents through the amazing journey of raising and educating their children.
Liz is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.
"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”
—John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling. For a copy of The Short Angry History of Compulsory Schooling, click here.
