The Steve Jobs Habit Every Homeschooling Parent Should Adopt
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Steve Jobs had a habit homeschoolers can benefit from.
But first, consider this: on average, we make 35,000 decisions in a single day. As homeschoolers, it’s likely that we make even more of these than the average person.
After making thousands of decisions, we begin to experience what the theorists refer to as “decision fatigue.”
When decision fatigue kicks in, the quality of our decisions starts to plummet. Over time, poor decision making will compound and eventually determine how successfully or unsuccessfully we raise our children, which includes homeschooling them.
The key to making better decisions then is the Steve Jobs’ strategy.
#1 Think Like Steve Jobs
You may know that Steve Jobs wore black T-shirts every day. He wasn’t being lazy or eccentric, he was practicing a technique to preserve his decision-making energy by automating trivial every day decisions
By wearing a black T-shirt, it was one less decision he had to make every day. The more decisions he could automate, the more energy he could conserve for more important Apple related matters.
Parenting Decisions that Impact Our Children
How does the strategy of automating every day decisions translate into the life of a homeschooler? We make Black T-shirt decisions every day, such as when to pull ourselves out of bed, when to serve breakfast, and when to take a break between lessons.
Our more important decisions might include deciding upon the most appropriate discipline for a misbehaving child or whether or not to join a field trip mid-week when we already have a full week and want to maintain a healthy balance for our family.
These aren’t the same level of decisions Steve Job has to make, but they are not unimportant decisions. Each decision we make contributes to our competency—or lack of—as parents, and it helps to mold who our children become.
Our characters are the sum of our actions, and this is true for our children too. We want them to learn to act in the best way possible; not perfectly, but on the side of right choices more than wrong choices.
Effective parenting skills is one of the ways we help them to develop well, and these parenting skills are tied up in the little decisions we make all day long.
It follows then that the more Black T-shirt decisions we can automate, the more energy we’ll have for making decisions with foresight and wisdom, not from a place of reaction and exhaustion.
Black T-Shirt Decisions
If the idea of automating some of your “black T-shirt” decisions makes sense, the first step is to begin paying attention to the decisions you make each morning.
Note which ones repeat themselves every day, such as how you spend your time before your children wake up, what clothes to wear, what time you’ll get your children out of bed, what clothes they’ll wear, who will clear the breakfast dishes, what chores need to be completed before homeschooling begins, and when you begin your homeschooling day.
That's a very short list of the thousands of decisions we make before the clock even strikes noon. Now that you have your list of decisions, you can then automate them by deciding one time how you will handle the decision, so you never have to waste time on it again.
For example, decide what your morning routine will be and stick to it. Maybe you’ll grab a cup of coffee and read a book, or you’ll workout for 30 minutes. Establish routines so you don’t waste energy deciding what to do and when to do it.
“In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing. The worst thing you can do is nothing.”
On the night before you sleep, review your plan for the next day. If there are any trivial every-day decisions to make, make them at night when your children have gone to sleep and you can spare the energy.
Know what your morning plan is, know what your children's morning plan is, know what you will prepare for breakfast, and definitely know what you are going to wear the next day (hopefully not a black tee!).
Without a fixed plan, not only will decision fatigue plague us much earlier in the day, but we might also linger in bed another ten minutes, decide to skip chores that day because we mismanaged our time, or start homeschooling three hours later than we intended to. The end of the day will arrive, and we will not feel good about how we managed it.
“You are fettered,” said Scrooge, trembling. “Tell me why?”
”I wear the chain I forged in life,” replied the Ghost. “I made it link by link, and yard by yard; I girded it on of my own free will, and of my own free will I wore it.”
Automating as many decisions as possible will help us to stay on course, which is critical as homeschooles. We have a window where we can teach our children, and that window passes quickly. If we aren’t careful, we can squander it on poor planning which leads to poor decision making.
Think Like Buddha
Inevitably, we will face making decisions when we are tired. In many cases, we can postpone making the decision until the next day, but only if we are mindful about it. Staying present with our levels of energy will help us to determine when it’s better to postpone making a decision.
We all know that moment when a friend asks us to do something, such as go out to dinner or meet for coffee, but we know we don't have time to accommodate her. However, we're tired when she asks us, and we say yes anyway, only to regret it later.
Sometimes, if we know we want to decline an invitation, and we are maxed out on decisions for the day, we can also be clumsy in our reply and inadvertently offend a friend. The next day, thinking more clearly, we’ll have to patch up our blunder,
Knowing when to postpone making a decision or when to reply to someone is critical to maintaining harmonious relationships. When I look back at some of the poor choices I’ve made, it’s often because I made them at an inconvenient time.
Had I waited until I could think more clearly, I would have made a better decision and caused myself, and possibly a friend, less disappointment.
Learning how to manage our decision-making energy and to postpone making weightier decisions until we are refreshed will lead to better parenting skills, well-adjusted children, and less regret in life.
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About Elizabeth Y. Hanson
Developing a comprehensive understanding of how to raise and educate a “whole” child, based on tradition and modern research, Liz devotes her time to helping parents to get it right.
Liz is a homeschooling thought-leader, as well as the creator of two unique online courses, Raise Your Child Well: Preserving Your Child's Natural Genius by Laying a Solid Foundation During the First Seven Years and the Smart Homeschooler Academy: Homeschooling the "Whole" Child for a Well-Trained Mind and Character
As an Educator, Homeschool Emerita, Writer, and Love and Leadership Certified Parenting Coach, Liz has 23 years of experience raising children and working in education.
Liz is available for one-on-one consultations as needed.
"I know Elizabeth Y. Hanson as a remarkably intelligent, highly sensitive woman with a moral nature and deep insight into differences between schooling and education. Elizabeth's mastery of current educational difficulties is a testimony to her comprehensive understanding of the competing worlds of schooling and education. She has a good heart and a good head. What more can I say?”
—John Taylor Gatto Distinguished educator, public speaker, and best-selling author of Dumbing Us Down: The Hidden Curriculum of Compulsory Schooling. For a copy of The Short Angry History of Compulsory Schooling, click here.
